You know, I often find myself in a place of self-reflection. Sometimes my “self-reflection” can flirt on (or completely cross over into) self-loathing when I’m not spending time or energy meditating on what God says about me.
Something that’s been on my heart a lot lately is that God doesn’t need me. The God who breathed life into and/or spoke existence into all of the universe and its pieces, the God who heals and performs various miracles, the God who could literally end all of humanity and everything as we know it in the bat of an eyelash…he doesn’t NEED me.
Here I am, little old me, be-bopping right on through life. Sometimes I’m selfish and I forget that what’s important to me doesn’t always move my neighbor. Sometimes I’m engrossed in things I can’t change because I forget to let go of my pieces and let God hold them and work them out as only He can. Sometimes I’ve inserted myself into so many things where I don’t belong and then grow offended when someone points out that I shouldn’t be there. God doesn’t NEED me.
See, while there are giftings I possess that he has entrusted within me. While there are places where God uses my availability and willingness to help others. While there are things I accomplish only because of favor and grace he’s placed in my life. God doesn’t NEED me.
His plan and his purpose would carry on whether or not I was obedient to him. The Bible tells us that if we didn’t, the very rocks and all of creation would cry out to the living God and declare his sovereignty. God doesn’t NEED me.
BUT…he WANTS me. He desires a relationship with me where I pour out to him because I WANT to. He desires the intimacy that only comes between two people who spend time together regularly. Two people who understand one another so completely that they understand the very heart of the other without a word being shared. He WANTS me. He wants ME.
Me, in all of my selfish ambitions, as I may often lose sight of what I should be doing. Me, in all of my own ignorance and extreme stubbornness. Me, in all of my awkwardness and putting my foot into my mouth. Me in my many failures and sometimes complete disregard for him. Me, in my brokenness and refusal to give in (even though he’s proven I should time and time again).
He doesn’t see me like I see me. He doesn’t look upon me with pity or complete disregard. He looks at me, and like the proud Papa that he is, he pours out loving adorations. He sees me and doesn’t say “there’s Teresa, what’d she mess up today?” or “Oh man, why won’t she give this up?!?” No, he sees me and says “There’s Teresa, my beloved, precious daughter. She sings over me and hides my word in her heart.”
I’m so grateful that he doesn’t NEED me. In all honesty, at the end of the day, if I had to choose between someone who NEEDS me and someone who WANTS me…I choose the latter. You see, a need can be met. Once it’s satisfied, you move on to the next piece. A want, however, is something you desire. Something you choose to contribute to. Something you cherish and hold dear. Something you brag about because you’re thrilled to have.
God doesn’t NEED me but he WANTS me. He wants you too, my friends.
I keep having these lyrics in my head over and over (though I don’t own the rights, obviously):
He is jealous for me; Love’s like a hurricane and I am a tree; bending beneath the weight of your wind and mercy; When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory;
And I realize just how beautiful You are;
And how great Your affections are for me
And oh, how He loves us oh
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all
❤️
Just Between Me & Jesus 